BEAVER FALLS, Pa. – Award-winning grocery store chain Safesexway has compiled its most recent foodstuff interviews into a new video called “Food Items Reveal the One Porn Star They’d Like to be Stuck Inside Forever.” In the video, various produce, canned goods and prepared foods...

LOS ANGELES – In a move they said may become permanent should California’s Proposition 60 pass, several adult websites intentionally reduced the amount of useful traffic they receive. The protest is sure to reduce their revenues while imposing a short-term minor inconvenience on...

LOS ANGELES – The inclusion of emergency management training information in a pornographic video was the result of a “tube site glitch,” according to the studio that produced the video in question. According to viewers who watched the clip before it was taken down, what appeared...

By Dewey Truman Special to YNOT PHOENIX – According to a few paragraphs of an article I quickly skimmed while looking over the shoulder of a man sitting outside a Starbucks, either former Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer plans to make a BDSM tape with Donald Trump, or celebrity attorney...

By Prudence Beecher Special to YNOT LOS ANGELES – It’s not every day I get a great idea from reading something other than the Bible, but recently I had one of those days when I read a column Sally Satel wrote for Forbes. To be clear, I don’t agree at all with the points made by...

By Brad Kellen Special to YNOT                                     GULFPORT, Miss. – Unless you’re a fan of the University of Mississippi-Gulfport Fightin’ Chickadees football team, my name is probably only familiar to you because of my unsuccessful romantic overtures toward...

By ModUb2 Special to YNOT LEXINGTON, Tenn. – Hello. My name is Model RF22K9581SG/AA, Unit 7341b2 (“ModUb2” for short) and I’m a home appliance of the sort people have taken to calling a “smart fridge.” To most people, a smart fridge is just a refrigerator connected to the...

AUSTIN, Texas – In light of a recent article that revealed several surprising habits of women who watch porn, I sat down with an informal focus group of men whose participation I secured by offering to give each of them a pack of cigarettes, a bottle of Thunderbird, and/or one of...

By Roger Beals Special to YNOT NEW YORK – As you may know, prior to becoming a valuable consultant to the campaign of a certain brilliant business mogul currently running for President of the United States, I was the chairman and chief executive officer of the Ferret News...

By Wayne Ted Jeffries Special to YNOT LAFOURCHE PARISH, La. – As a serial killer serving a life sentence with no prospect for parole, and for whom the usual exercise and recreation options for inmates are strictly forbidden, I’ve had little choice than to become an avid reader in...